Nov 282017
 
Joke Of The Day: Irish Sunday School

A true story from an Irish Sunday School Teacher

 
I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven.

I asked them, “If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?”

“NO!” the children answered.

“If I cleaned the church every day, manicured the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?”

Again, the answer was “NO!”

“If I gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?”

Again, they all answered “NO!”

I was just bursting with pride for them. I continued, “Then how can I get into heaven?”

A little boy shouted out: “YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN ‘ DEAD!”

It’s a curious race, the Irish.

 

 

 

Sex Ed Class, 1929

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Apr 172017
 

sex-ed-class-1929

Sex education class, 1929.

As you can see, this is all new to them.
Well, all except for Blanche (second row, far right).

 

Joke Of The Day: Expanding Organ

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Apr 172017
 
Joke Of The Day: Expanding Organ Sixth grade science teacher Mrs. Samson asks her class: “Who can tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?”

Nobody raises a hand, so she calls on the first student to look her way. “Mary, can you tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?”

Mary stands up, blushing furiously. “How dare you ask such a question?” she says. “I’m going to complain to my parents, who will complain to the principal, who will have you fired!”

Mrs. Sampson is shocked by Mary’s reaction, but undaunted. She asks the class the question again, and this time Sam raises his hand.

“Yes, Sam?” says Mrs. Sampson. “Ma’am, the correct answer is the iris of the human eye.” “Very good, Sam. Thank you.”

Mrs. Sampson then turns to Mary and says, “Mary, I have 3 things to tell you: first, it’s clear that you have not done your homework. Second, you have a dirty mind. And third, I fear one day you are going to be sadly disappointed.”

 

 

 

Joke Of The Day: Teacher And Student

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Aug 052016
 
Rubber Chicken Teacher: Whoever answers my next question, can go home.

One boy throws his bag out the window.

Teacher: Who just threw that?

Boy: Me and I’m going home now.