Tag: Hookers

Jokes

Joke Of The Day: Tax Time

Rubber Chicken A woman walks into her accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.

The accountant says: “Before we begin, I’ll need to ask you a few questions.” He gets her name, address, social security number, etc, and then asks, “what is your occupation?”

“I’m a whore,” she says.

The accountant balks and says, “No, No, No, that won’t work. That is too gross. Let’s try to rephrase that.”

The woman says, “OK, I’m a high-end call girl.”

“No, that is still too crude. Try again.”

They both think for a minute, then the woman says, “I’m an elite chicken farmer.”

The accountant asks, “What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore & call girl?”

“Well, I raised over a thousand little peckers last year.”

He replies: “Good enough.”

 

 

Jokes

Joke Of The Day

After many months of trying to make ends meet, one California couple decided that the only way they were going to get any extra cash was to have the old lady start hooking.

Early the next morning the wife comes home looking very haggard and worn out. The husband guiltily asks how she did, and the wife replies that she earned four hundred dollars and ten cents.

“That`s great!” the husband replies. “But who gave you the ten cents?”

“Everybody!” replied the wife.

Jokes

Joke Of The Day

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him “Father, I have a problem.

I have two female parrots but they only know to say one thing.”

“What do they say?” the priest asked.

They say “Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?”

“That’s obscene!” the priest exclaimed.

Then he thought for a moment. “You know,” he said “I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to my house and we’ll put them in the cage with Francis and Peter.”

“My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship and your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time.”

“Thank you.” the woman responded. “This may very well be the solution.”

The next day she brought her female parrots to the priest’s house. As he ushered her in,
she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying.

Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them.

After a few minutes the female parrots cried out in unison: “Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?”

There was stunned silence.

One male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and says… “Put the beads away, Frank. Our prayers have been answered!”

Amusing

Union Rules

A dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels. When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, ‘Is this a union house?’

‘No,’ she replied, ‘I’m sorry it isn’t.’

‘Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?’

‘The house gets $80 and the girls get $20,’ she answered..

Offended at such unfair dealings, the union man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, ‘Why yes sir, this is a union house. ‘We observe all union rules.’

The man asked, ‘And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?’ ‘The girls get $80 and the house gets $20.’

‘That’s more like it!’ the union man said.

He handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a stunningly attractive green-eyed blonde ..

‘I’d like her,’ he said.

‘I’m sure you would, sir,’ said the Madam. Then she gestured to a 92-year old woman in the corner, ‘but Ethel here has 67 years seniority and according to union rules, she’s next.’