Sep 132017
 
Joke Of The Day: Costco Doctor One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, ‘My elbow hurts like heck. I guess I’d better see a doctor.’

‘Listen, you don’t have to spend that kind of money,’ Mike replies.

There’s a diagnostic computer down at Costco. Just give it a urine sample, and the computer will tell you what’s wrong and what to do about it.

It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars – a lot cheaper than a doctor.

So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Costco.

He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:’You have tennis elbow.

Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.

Thank you for shopping @ Costco’

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good measure.

Joe hurries back to Costco, eager to check the results.

He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant — Twins. They aren’t yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don’t stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better!

Thank you for shopping @ Costco!

 

 

 

Free Bear Hugs

 Amusing, Funny  Comments Off on Free Bear Hugs
Aug 302016
 

Utah-based comedian and YouTube prankster Stuart Edge stuffed himself inside a giant Costco teddy bear to hand out free bear hugs and shows off some moves at a local skate park.

Enjoy!

 

12 Costco Secrets You’ve Never Heard Before

 Amusing, Information  Comments Off on 12 Costco Secrets You’ve Never Heard Before
Mar 032016
 

Does Costco really have the best prices? Are there ways to avoid membership fees? What are the worst buys in the store? And what about those Costco coupons.

How to Save at Costco: Krazy Coupon Ladies, Joanie Demer and Heather Wheeler show you all the best hidden savings at Costco including how to shop without a membership, why you don’t need your coupon booklet and how to easily compare prices to Amazon!

 

Ready Bake Pizza On The Grill

 Recipes  Comments Off on Ready Bake Pizza On The Grill
Sep 172015
 

Ready Bake Pizza On The Grill

Ready Bake Pizza On The Grill

Costco pizzas are excellent for this. I haven’t tried this with a frozen pizza yet but imagine the only difference may be a slightly longer cook time.


Cook Time: 9 min


Ingredients

  • Ready Bake or Frozen Pizza

Instructions

  1. Place a pizza stone on the grill and preheat it to about 350 degrees (direct medium).
  2. When the grill reaches the desired temperature, place the pizza on the pizza stone and cook for 8 to 10 minutes.
  3. Eat and enjoy!

By Gags

 

Secret Price Codes

 Information  Comments Off on Secret Price Codes
Jul 292013
 

Secret Price Codes

A cheat sheet for saving even more money at major retailers–by knowing their secret price codes.

Several popular retailers use “secret” price codes that can clue you in on whether an item is the best deal at the store or not. Here’s a handy chart you can use while shopping to decode those numbers.

Here are the pricing structures for Costco, Target, Sam’s Club, BJ’s, Home Depot, Gap/Old Navy, Sears, and Office Depot. Look for the price on the tag and if it ends in one of these numbers or letters/symbols, you’ll know if you’re getting a really good deal or just the regular price. (Marked down just means it’s on sale, Final Markdown is the lowest price the store will drop it to, Clearance/Discontinued means the store isn’t gong to restock it.)

If you only remember one thing, though, just look for the price ending in any number other than 9 or 99, and you’ll know you’re getting less than full retail price.

Source…

California Gas Prices Skyrocket To Nearly 6 Dollars A Gallon

 Information, Political  Comments Off on California Gas Prices Skyrocket To Nearly 6 Dollars A Gallon
Oct 062012
 

You better watch out Barack, something like this may put California in play this November.

Gasoline station owners in the Los Angeles area including Costco Wholesale Corp. (COST) are beginning to shut pumps as the state’s oil refiners started rationing supplies and spot prices surged to a record.

Valero Energy Corp. (VLO) stopped selling gasoline on the spot, or wholesale, market in Southern California and is allocating deliveries to customers. Exxon Mobil Corp. (XOM) is also rationing fuel to U.S. West Coast terminal customers. Costco’s outlet in Simi Valley, 40 miles (64 kilometers) northwest of Los Angeles, ran out of regular gasoline yesterday and was selling premium fuel at the price of regular.

The gasoline shortage “feels like a hurricane to me, but it’s the West Coast,” Jeff Cole, Costco’s vice president of gasoline, said by telephone yesterday. “We’re obviously extremely disheartened that we are unable to do this, and we’re pulling fuel from all corners of California to fix this.”

Spot gasoline in Los Angeles has surged $1 a gallon this week to a record $1.45 a gallon premium versus gasoline futures traded on the New York Mercantile Exchange, data compiled by Bloomberg show. That’s the highest level for the fuel since at least November 2007, when Bloomberg began publishing prices there. On an outright basis, the fuel has jumped to $4.3929 a gallon.

Read more…

 

Costco Versus Your Grocery Store

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Feb 102012
 

Wondering if a Costco membership is really worth it? This grocery store vs. Costco experiment compares food prices.

Buying in bulk at Costco can save your family lots of money—depending on what you buy. To find out exactly which items are the best deals at the wholesale club, personal finance blog Squawkfox did a shopping experiment comparing unit prices on fresh, frozen, and packaged goods between a local grocery and Costco.

The results are interesting, with the local grocery store coming out ahead for fresh foods (fruits, cheese, chicken, and milk), but Costco saving almost 21% on everything else priced out:

Importantly, the quality of the frozen foods at Costco was better than the supermarket’s generic brand.

In short, a Costco membership might make sense for buying in bulk once a month for those strategic items (frozen foods, canned goods, diapers, etc.)—keeping in mind our previously tip to avoid buying soda, toilet paper, and office supplies at Costco because you can get these at the supermarket on sale cheaper with coupons. Of course, your mileage may vary, so definitely check prices yourself, but the figures above may give you an idea if shopping Costco for certain foods is worth it or not for you. Check out the full article for more tips on making the most of a Costco membership and saving more at Costco.

Source…

Costco’s Shopping List for Armageddon

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Oct 112010
 

Either our nation’s obesity problem is just as bad as they say, or Costco knows something we don’t, because the big box store is now offering enough food to last you a year for a about $800.

The monstrous, 5,000 serving package, courtesy of food outfitter Shelf Reliance claims their end days buffet contains “only top-of-the-line products,” “developed with everyday menu planning in mind.”


Shelf Reliance is your premier source for food storage and emergency preparedness planning. Because nothing is more important than the health and safety of your family, they provide only top-of-the-line products. Shelf Reliances line of THRIVE Foods are held to the highest standards. All THRIVE Foods have been developed with everyday menu planning in mind, though they are also the perfect addition to your long-term food storage supply. With their great taste and simple preparation, THRIVE is a trusted source of healthy, delicious meals anytime.

The THRIVE 1 Year Food Supply comes complete with 84 #10 (gallon size) cans of grains, fruits, veggies, protein & beans, dairy, and baking essentials. With over 5,000 servings and many foods with a shelf life of up to 25 years, this package will give you variety, nutrition, and peace of mind.
  • 12 month food supply for 1 Person
  • 6 month food supply for 2 People
  • 3 month food supply for 4 People
  • Shipment arrives in 14 separate boxes
  • Grains and rice have a shelf life of up to 30 years
  • Freeze-dried foods have a shelf life of up to 25 years
  • Dehydrated foods have a shelf life of up to 15 years
  • Simple rehydration instructions, recipes, and helpful tips are included on each can
  • 5,011 total servings
  • 84 gallon-sized cans
This THRIVE 1 Year 1 Person Food Storage package contains 84 #10 (gallon size) cans. See below for specific package contents.
Grains
  • 8 Cans of Instant White Rice (48 servings per can)
  • 12 Cans of Hard White Winter Wheat (44 servings per can)
  • 3 Cans of 6 Grain Pancake Mix (50 servings per can)
  • 2 Cans of Elbow Macaroni (45 servings per can)
Vegetables
  • 6 Cans of Dehydrated Potato Chunks (42 servings per can)
  • 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Sweet Corn (46 servings per can)
  • 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Green Peas (41 servings per can)
  • 1 Cans of Dehydrated Chopped Onions (45 servings per can)
  • 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Mushroom Pieces (48 servings per can)
  • 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Broccoli (47 servings per can)  
Fruits
  • 2 Cans of Organic Apple Slices (48 servings per can)
  • 2 Cans of Freeze-Dried Strawberries (45 servings per can)
  • 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Blueberries (50 servings per can)
  • 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Blackberries (49 servings per can)
  • 2 Cans of Freeze-Dried Raspberries (48 servings per can)
Dairy
  • 6 Cans of Powdered Milk (43 servings per can)
  • 3 Cans of Chocolate Drink Mix (48 servings per can) 
Proteins/Beans
The taste and texture of TVP (Textured Vegetable Protein) is consistent with real meat, making it a great addition to vegetarian diets
  • 3 Cans of Bacon TVP (47 servings per can)
  • 3 Cans of Beef TVP (44 servings per can)
  • 3 Cans of Chicken TVP (45 servings per can)
  • 2 Cans of Taco TVP (42 servings per can)
  • 6 Cans of Pinto Beans (49 servings per can)
  • 1 Can of Black Beans (49 servings per can)
  • 2 Cans of Lima Beans (49 servings per can)
  • 3 Cans of Lentils (52 servings per can)
  • 6 Cans of Whole Eggs (236 servings per can) 
Cooking Basics
  • 2 Cans of White Sugar (46 servings per can)

Source…


My Trip to Costco

 Amusing  Comments Off on My Trip to Costco
Jul 302009
 

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? On an impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s butt and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Kirkland Beer: Costco To Sell Its Own Beer

 Amusing  Comments Off on Kirkland Beer: Costco To Sell Its Own Beer
Feb 032008
 

I hope it comes in a 250 pack!

Costco looking at selling own line of beer


Costco Wholesale Corp. has applied to sell its own brand of beer, according to Bloomberg News.

The Kirkland Signature label applications for pale ale, amber ale, hefeweizen and a lager were approved last week by the Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau. Bloomberg reported Costco already offers Kirkland Signature wines and is one of the top sellers of wine in the U.S.


Costco to Become a New Name in Battle of the Brews


The big brewers have fretted that decades of copycat, chucklehead advertising has reduced their biggest-selling brands to indistinguishable commodities in the eyes of many consumers. Now they may be reaping what they’ve sown: Costco, one of the nation’s largest warehouse retailers, is readying its first line of private-label beers.

One analyst said said the rollout of Kirkland Signature Hefeweizen is most likely to hurt sub-premium brands.

The retailer has filed label applications with the federal Tax and Trade Bureau for a Kirkland Signature Hefeweizen, amber ale and pale ale. The beers will be brewed by San Francisco-area craft brewer Gordon Biersch, which also brews private-label beers for the Trader Joe’s supermarket chain.

Big-box stores such as Costco have been a lucrative source of case sales for brewers and any additional competition in the channel will not be appreciated at a time when those brewers are struggling to increase sales.

Who will suffer more?
Stifel Nicolaus analyst Mark Swartzberg said the rollout’s impact is most likely to hurt sub-premium brands such as Anheuser-Busch’s Busch and Natural Light, Miller Brewing’s Milwaukee’s Best Light and Coors’ Keystone. That category of beers is underperforming overall as of late, he said. “It’s a very cluttered space, and price and promotions tend to matter more there.”

Still, while private-label brands generally tend to compete with the low end of their categories, sub-premium brands don’t have much of a presence at Costco, which tends to sell higher-end items at bulk prices. Craft-beer styles such as Hefeweizen might appeal more to drinkers who would otherwise be buying Michelob or Sam Adams than they would to the typical purchaser of a Busch Light 30 pack.

That suggests that it’s premium brands that might hurt more from the Costco entry. “If you ask the brand guys if they’d rather the private labels didn’t exist, they’d say yes,” said Mr. Swartzberg.

Could grow the market
Then there’s the possibility that the new entry could simply grow the market. The presence of a private label might actually cause shoppers to buy more beer than they would have otherwise, he said.

A call to Costco’s corporate office was not returned, but the retailer has been offering private-label wines — including a Champagne and a New Zealand sauvignon blanc from the heralded Marlborough region — and spirits for some time.

The Kirkland label application — first reported by Miller Brewing Co’s corporate blog, BrewBlog — coincides with a court ruling against Costco yesterday in a long-running dispute between the retailer and Washington state beer wholesalers. A federal appeals court rejected a lower court’s ruling that Washington statutes banning certain volume discounts and preventing retailers from taking beer directly from a warehouse. The decision strengthened the position of beer distributors, who have been in the somewhat awkward role of warring in court with their biggest customers.