Joke Of The Day: Texas Compassion

Rubber Chicken A very gentle Texas lady was driving across a high bridge outside San Antonio one day. As she neared the top of the bridge, she noticed a young man fixin’ to jump. She stopped her car, rolled down the window and said, “Please don’t jump! Think of your dear mother and father!”

“Mom and Dad are both dead,” he said sadly, then turned back toward his doom. “I’m going to jump!”

“Wait!” she said. “Think of your wife and children!”

“My wife left me,” he replied, “and I don’t have any kids.”

“Well, then,” she said, grasping at straws, “think of the Alamo!”

He replied, “What’s the Alamo?”

“Well bless your heart,” she said. “Just go ahead and jump, you dumb ass Yankee!”

 

 

Joke Of The Day: Lighten The Load

Rubber Chicken An Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and Texan were flying across country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says ” We’re having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump, at least one of you can survive”

The four open the door and look out below.

The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers “God Save The Queen” and jumps.

The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers “Viva La France” and he also jumps.

This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers “Remember the Alamo” and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.

 

 

Joke Of The Day

One day, a very gentle Texas lady was driving across a high bridge in Austin . As she neared the top of the bridge, she noticed a young man fixin to jump….

She stopped her car, rolled down the window, and said, “Please don’t jump! Think of your dear mother and father.”

He replied, “My mom and dad are both dead; I’m going to jump.”

She said, “Well, think of your sweet wife and precious children.”

He replied, “I’m not married, and I don’t have any kids.”

She said, “Well, then you just remember the Alamo .”

He replied, ”What’s the Alamo?”

She replied,….. ”Well bless your heart,….just go ahead and jump you little Yankee bastard!