You Know You’re Old When…
- You quit trying to hold in your stomach, no matter who walks into the room.
- You enjoy watching the news.
- The only reason you’re still awake at 4 am is indigestion.
- People ask what color your hair USED to be.
- You’re proud of your lawn mower.
- Your best friend is dating someone half their age AND isn’t breaking any laws.
- You start singing along with the elevator music.
- You really do want a new washing machine for your birthday.
- You’ve owned clothes so long that they’ve come back into style–TWICE.
- You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
- You consider coffee one of the most important things in life.
- 8 AM is your idea of “sleeping in.”
- You write thank you notes without being told.
- You start Christmas shopping in August.
- You paint walls for a reason other than getting your deposit back.
- You don’t like to drive after dark.
- You say the words “Turn that music down!”
- You point out what buildings used to be where.
- You know all the warning signs of a heart attack.
- You rake the yard without being told to.
- You can’t remember the last time you lay on the floor to watch television.
- The service station attendant lets you pump your gas before paying.
- You start your conversation with; “When I was younger”.
- The highlight of your week is playing bingo.
- You understand the dangers of drinking.
- Some asks you; “What did you used to do?” or “How did they used to do it when you were my age?”
- Pogo sticks look more like a form of punishment than fun.
- You have your chiropractor on your speed dial.
