Joke Of The Day

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Sep 302010
 

A dog lover, whose dog was a bitch and ‘in heat’, agreed to look after and house her neighbors’ male dog while they were away on vacation. She had a large house and she believed that she could keep them apart, but as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds. She rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together, in obvious pain and unable to disengage as so frequently happens when they mate.

Unable to separate them and perplexed as to what to do next, although it was late, she called the veterinarian, who answered in a very grumpy voice.

After having the problem explained to him, the vet said, “Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs. I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and be able to withdraw.”

“Do you think that will work?” she asked. “It just worked for me” he replied.

Sep 292010
 

Excellent letter by a true patriot.


I write this letter as a patriot, a taxpayer, a lifelong resident and as concerned citizen of what I consider to be the greatest nation ever known to man, the United States of America.

I am Caucasian, so let’s get the racial aspect out of the way to start with. This letter has nothing to do with your race. I lived through the cruelty of Jim Crow and segregation and learned early on in my life that the color of my skin does not make me better or worse than any other man.

We all remember Martin Luther King, Jr.’s statement about judging people, not by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character, and I believe that with all my heart.

I believe that America is an exceptional country. We have been liberator, benefactor and leader of the free world for centuries. America is an example of what can be achieved by free people living under the free enterprise system.

We have led the world in technology, industry, science and medicine for a long time.

Our capitalist system guarantees that those who explore new worlds and bring us new products and better techniques are amply rewarded for their efforts, and this is as it should be.

A person who is the first one to get there and the last one to leave, who burns the midnight oil and never gives up until they realize their goals, are a boon to humankind. They’re the ones who discover new cures, start new industries and create jobs.

These people deserve to be rewarded for their hard work and for the products and services they bring to make life better for all mankind.

Mr. President, it is my personal opinion that you want to take the well-earned rewards of these people and give it to those who have done nothing to deserve them.

It’s really redistribution of wealth, and it’s nothing new. It’s been tried many places before and it has miserably failed in every one of them.

It’s called socialism.

Am I calling you a socialist? Yes, I am. I firmly believe that you are a socialist and a globalist, and that you think America should have a comeuppance and have our playing field leveled to match those of other countries not as industrious or as innovative as we are.

Mr. President, how can you support the building of a mosque in the very same area where Islamic radicals murdered so many Americans?

Just who’s side are you on?

Am I accusing you of being a Muslim? No I’m not, but the jury is still out a little bit on that subject in my mind, because many times your sympathies seem to lean in that direction. You need to watch who you bow to Mr. President.

You have betrayed a whole generation of African-Americans who voted for you because they really believed all that junk about “hope and change,” they really thought you were going to do something great and the only thing you’ve done is to make their jobs disappear and their health insurance go up.

You and your party have corrupted duly elected officials in an effort to get your legislative agenda passed. Remember the “Louisiana Purchase” and the “Cornhusker Kickback,” and that’s just a couple we know about, but you bought off a bunch of congressmen and senators, knowing that you were going against the will of the majority of Americans, because you think that you and your arrogant friends know more about what’s good for America than the citizens your disastrous actions effect.

Am I accusing you of being an elitist? You bet.

I don’t believe you take the Islamic threat to America nearly as seriously as you should. You use semantics like “Overseas Contingency Operation” and “Man Caused Disasters” to soften your rhetoric toward people who would like nothing better than decapitate the entire population of America.

And Mr. President, if you’d really like to know the kind of warriors who are fighting the “Overseas Contingency Operation,” and you would like to really know about what kind of enemies they’re fighting, you should read a book called Lone Survivor by a brave, young Navy Seal named Marcus Lutrell who went to hell and back for his country, and is still a dedicated patriot. I think you’d find it enlightening, Mr. President and after you finish it would you pass it on to Janet Napolitano? And by the way, tell her that my invitation to take her to Iraq and show her some “Man Caused Disasters” is still open.

Am I calling you naïve? Absolutely.

You seem to think that America has an endless supply of tax dollars for you to waste and give away, and the debt you’ve piled up could well bankrupt the greatest nation on earth.

Am I calling you a failure, Mr. President? With all due respect that’s exactly what I’m doing.

Source…


The Rolling Memorial

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Sep 292010
 

The Rolling Memorial is a semi-trailer truck painted with a mural intended to honor the victims of the 9/11 attacks. The project was conceived by John Holmgren of Shafer, Minnesota after hearing the song “Have You Forgotten” by country singer Darryl Worley. Holmgren has been ‘pulled over’ numerous times just so the troopers can get their picture taken with the truck.


Pass this on so that others can see.

Joke Of The Day

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Sep 292010
 

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.

The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman’s new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before!

All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty! One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, “Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you.”

“My darling,” he replied, “think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek.”

The Tea Party: Brewing Up a Movement

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Sep 282010
 

Glenn Reynolds is a commenter in this documentary by the Knoxville News-Sentinel about the Tea Party.

In April 2009, political rallies were held nationwide in protest of government spending and economic bailouts. Called “Tea Parties,” these rallies spurred a new political phenomenon that has created a stir at the polls and received support by Sarah Palin. Tea Partiers have various reasons for getting involved in politics, but their most common refrain is that the government is not solving the nation’s problems. Critics acknowledge that as a movement, the Tea Party is not tasked with creating solutions like the Republican and Democratic parties. Although the future of the Tea Party movement and its lasting impact on the political system is unclear, it has brought many new people into the political process.

NFL Pre Game Flyovers

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Sep 282010
 

As the National Anthem comes to it’s final lines, there is nothing that gets you as psyched up for the kickoff as the pre-game flyover by one of our armed forces jets. Patriotism is at its highest when we see them streak over the stadium with the roar of their engines as the game is set to begin.

God bless America!

Joke Of The Day

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Sep 282010
 

A Dedicated Teamsters Union Worker was attending a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels.

When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, “Is this a union house?”

“No,'”she replied, “I’m sorry it isn’t.”

“Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?”

“The house gets $80 and the girls get $20,'”she answered.

Offended at such unfair dealings, the union man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop.

His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, “Why yes sir, this is a union house. We observe all union rules.”

The man asked, “And, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?”

“The girls get $80 and the house gets $20.”

“That’s more like it!” the union man said.

He handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a stunningly attractive green-eyed blonde.

“I’d like her,” he said.

“I’m sure you would, sir,” said the Madam.

Then she gestured to a 92-year old woman in the corner, “but Ethel here has 67 years seniority and according to union rules, she’s next.'”