The Bigger the Government, The Smaller the Citizen

 Amusing  Comments Off on The Bigger the Government, The Smaller the Citizen
Aug 312010
 

Dennis Prager, nationally syndicated radio talk show host and best-selling author, asks a fascinating and important question: what happens to the citizens of a country when the government gets bigger and bigger?

Joke Of The Day

 Jokes  Comments Off on Joke Of The Day
Aug 312010
 

Mohamed heard one of his wives was leaving him, so he rushed home where he found her on the carpet in front of the tent with her belongings; he sat beside her and said, “I heard you were planning to leave me?”

She replied, “Yes, I heard your other wives saying you were a pedophile!”

Mohamed thinks for a minute or so and then responds, “That’s a mighty big word for a 6 year old.”

Getting A Raise In These Times

 Jokes  Comments Off on Getting A Raise In These Times
Aug 312010
 

Employee: Excuse me sir, may I talk to you?
Boss: Sure, come on in. What can I do for you?

Employee: Well sir, as you know, I have been an employee of this prestigious firm for over ten years.
Boss: Yes.

Employee: I won’t beat around the bush. Sir, I would like a raise. I currently have four companies after me and so I decided to talk to you first.
Boss: A raise? I would love to give you a raise, but this is just not the right time.

Employee: I understand your position, and I know that the current economic downturn has had a negative impact on sales, but you must also take into consideration my hard work, pro- activeness and loyalty to this company for over a decade.

Boss: Taking into account these factors, and considering I don’t want to start a brain drain, I’m willing to offer you a fifteen percent raise and an extra five days of vacation time. How does that sound?
Employee: Great! It’s a deal! Thank you, sir!

Boss: Before you go, just out of curiosity, what companies were after you?
Employee: Oh, the Electric Company, Gas Company, Water Company and the Mortgage Company!

What We Saw at the Glenn Beck Rally in DC

 Amusing  Comments Off on What We Saw at the Glenn Beck Rally in DC
Aug 302010
 

On August 28, 2010, Fox News host Glenn Beck held his “Restoring Honor” rally at the foot of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C. The aim of the event, explained the lachrymose TV personality, was to “come celebrate America by honoring our heroes, our heritage and our future.”

As the Washington Post reports,

“For too long, this country has wandered in darkness, and we have wandered in darkness in periods from the beginning,” Beck said, at times pacing at the memorial. “We have had moments of brilliance and moments of darkness. But this country has spent far too long worried about scars and thinking about the scars and concentrating on the scars.

“Today,” he continued, “we are going to concentrate on the good things in America, the things that we have accomplished – and the things that we can do tomorrow. The story of America is the story of humankind.”

Despite the presence of former Gov. Sarah Palin and many Tea Party trappings, the event was not political, or at least not in any conventional sense. Rather, the speakers called for bringing religion into the public square and using it as the guiding force in all aspects of American life.

Reason.tv was on hand to take in the day and talk with some of the thousands of people who showed up (crowd estimates were unavailable at the time of this writing, though the crowd felt thinner than the one at last year’s Tea Party rally). Most of the people we talked to were openly skeptical of politicians of both major parties and agreed strongly with the religious bent of the rally, often arguing that some sort of religious orientation was necessary for what that saw as a return to national greatness.

“What We Saw at the Glenn Beck Rally in DC” was shot by Jim Epstein with help from Josh Swain. Edited by Epstein and Meredith Bragg. Hosted by Nick Gillespie.

Joke Of The Day

 Jokes  Comments Off on Joke Of The Day
Aug 302010
 

An African ambassador visited Russia and was entertained by his opposite number, the Russian ambassador. For three days, the African ambassador was wined, dined, and generally treated to the best hospitality that Russia had to offer.

On the last day of his visit, the Russian ambassador said, “As your stay is coming to an end, it’s time for you to play our traditional game, Russian roulette. One of the six chambers of this gun is loaded – you spin the cylinder, point the gun at your head, and pull the trigger.”

This phased the African slightly, but he was a proud man of a warrior people, and to show fear would be unthinkable. Both men took their guns, spun, and pulled the triggers.

Both chambers were empty, and both ambassadors breathed a sigh of relief.

The African ambassador was impressed with the courageous game, and thought hard about the subject before the Russian Ambassador was due to visit his country the next year.

When the visit came, the African ambassador treated the Russian with all hospitality, until the final day of his stay. Leading him to a private room in the palace, the African ambassador spoke, “Now, time for you to sample our game, African roulette”. He then led the Russian into the room, the only occupants of which were six stunning and naked women.

The African ambassador said, “These women are the most beautiful members of one of our tribes. Any one of them will give you a oral sex – take your pick”.

The Russian was not entirely averse to this idea, but he couldn’t see the connection with Russian Roulette. He said, “Well, OK, great, but where’s the roulette part? Where’s the danger?”

With a big grin on his face, the African ambassador answered:

“One of them’s a cannibal.”

Steve Forbes: Obama Thinks He’ll be on “Mount Rushmore”; Willing to Martyr Democrats For His “Revolution”

 Amusing  Comments Off on Steve Forbes: Obama Thinks He’ll be on “Mount Rushmore”; Willing to Martyr Democrats For His “Revolution”
Aug 292010
 

More and more people are telling it like it is.

“He feels that, in terms of what he’s done, long-term it will make him a great President – put him on Mount Rushmore – change America from a greedy nation to a quiet socialist nation that knows its place in the world. So, in that sense, he’s just going to go along with it, and if the Democrats take a loss, they’re just martyrs to his revolution.”

Joke Of The Day

 Jokes  Comments Off on Joke Of The Day
Aug 292010
 

Two old men were sitting in a bar, discussing their wives.

The first said, “Last night, I asked my wife if we could try sex in a different position. I wanted to try doing it doggy-style.”

“Doggy-style? Did she go for it?”

“I’ll say we did it doggy-style. I sat up and begged, she rolled over and played dead.”

Life Before Computers

 Amusing  Comments Off on Life Before Computers
Aug 292010
 

Before Computers:

An application was for employment.

A program was a TV show.

A cursor used profanity.

A keyboard was a piano!

Memory was something that you lost with age.

A CD was a bank account.

And if you had a 3 1/2 inch floppy You hoped nobody found out!

Compress was something you did to garbage not something you did to a file.

If you unzipped anything in public You’d be in jail for awhile!

Log on was adding wood to a fire.

Hard drive was a long trip on the road.

A mouse pad was where a mouse lived.

A backup happened to your toilet!

Cut you did with a pocket knife and Paste you did with glue.

A web was a spider’s home.

And a virus was the flue!

Barack Obama Has Awakened a Sleeping Nation

 Amusing  Comments Off on Barack Obama Has Awakened a Sleeping Nation
Aug 282010
 

The article below was written by Gary Hubbell, a rancher, fishing guide and real estate agent, in Aspen Colorado of all places.


Barack Obama is the best thing that has happened to America in the last 100 years. Truly, he is the savior of America’s future. He is the best thing ever.

Despite the fact that he has some of the lowest approval ratings among recent presidents, history will see Barack Obama as the source of America’s resurrection. Barack Obama has plunged the country into levels of debt that we could not have previously imagined; his efforts to nationalize health care have been met with fierce resistance nationwide; TARP bailouts and stimulus spending have shown little positive effect on the national economy; unemployment is unacceptably high and looks to remain that way for most of a decade; legacy entitlement programs have ballooned to unsustainable levels, and there is a seething anger in the populace.

That’s why Barack Obama is such a good thing for America.

Obama is the symbol of a creeping liberalism that has infected our society like a cancer for the last 100 years. Just as Hitler is the face of fascism, Obama will go down in history as the face of unchecked liberalism. The cancer metastasized to the point where it could no longer be ignored.

Average Americans who have quietly gone about their lives, earning a paycheck, contributing to their favorite charities, going to high school football games on Friday night, spending their weekends at the beach or on hunting trips — they’ve gotten off the fence. They’ve woken up. There is a level of political activism in this country that we haven’t seen since the American Revolution, and Barack Obama has been the catalyst that has sparked a restructuring of the American political and social consciousness.

Think of the crap we’ve slowly learned to tolerate over the past 50 years as liberalism sought to re-structure the America that was the symbol of freedom and liberty to all the people of the world. Immigration laws were ignored on the basis of compassion. Welfare policies encouraged irresponsibility, the fracturing of families, and a cycle of generations of dependency. Debt was regarded as a tonic to lubricate the economy. Our children left school having been taught that they are exceptional and special, while great numbers of them cannot perform basic functions of mathematics and literacy. Legislators decided that people could not be trusted to defend their own homes, and stripped citizens of their rights to own firearms. Productive members of society have been penalized with a heavy burden of taxes in order to support legions of do-nothings who loll around, reveling in their addictions, obesity, indolence, ignorance and “disabilities.” Criminals have been arrested and re-arrested, coddled and set free to pillage the citizenry yet again. Lawyers routinely extort fortunes from doctors, contractors and business people with dubious torts.

We slowly learned to tolerate these outrages, shaking our heads in disbelief, and we went on with our lives.

But Barack Obama has ripped the lid off a seething cauldron of dissatisfaction and unrest.

In the time of Barack Obama, Black Panther members stand outside polling places in black commando uniforms, slapping truncheons into their palms. ACORN — a taxpayer-supported organization — is given a role in taking the census, even after its members were caught on tape offering advice to set up child prostitution rings. A former Communist is given a paid government position in the White House as an advisor to the president. Auto companies are taken over by the government, and the auto workers’ union — whose contracts are completely insupportable in any economic sense — is rewarded with a stake in the company. Government bails out Wall Street investment bankers and insurance companies, who pay their executives outrageous bonuses as thanks for the public support. Terrorists are read their Miranda rights and given free lawyers. And, despite overwhelming public disapproval, Barack Obama has pushed forward with a health care plan that would re-structure one-sixth of the American economy.

I don’t know about you, but the other day I was at the courthouse doing some business, and I stepped into the court clerk’s office and changed my voter affiliation from “Independent” to “Republican.” I am under no illusion that the Republican party is perfect, but at least they’re starting to awaken to the fact that we cannot sustain massive levels of debt; we cannot afford to hand out billions of dollars in corporate subsidies; we have to somehow trim our massive entitlement programs; we can no longer be the world’s policeman and dole out billions in aid to countries whose citizens seek to harm us.

Literally millions of Americans have had enough. They’re organizing, they’re studying the Constitution and the Federalist Papers, they’re reading history and case law, they’re showing up at rallies and meetings, and a slew of conservative candidates are throwing their hats into the ring. Is there a revolution brewing? Yes, in the sense that there is a keen awareness that our priorities and sensibilities must be radically re-structured. Will it be a violent revolution? No. It will be done through the interpretation of the original document that has guided us for 220 years — the Constitution. Just as the pendulum swung to embrace political correctness and liberalism, there will be a backlash, a complete repudiation of a hundred years of nonsense. A hundred years from now, history will perceive the year 2010 as the time when America got back on the right track. And for that, we can thank Barack Hussein Obama.

Source…


Joke Of The Day

 Jokes  Comments Off on Joke Of The Day
Aug 282010
 

A snake and a rabbit were racing along a pair of intersecting forest pathways one day, when they collided at the intersection. They immediately began to argue with one another as to who was at fault for the mishap.

When the snake remarked that he had been blind since birth, and thus should be given additional leeway, the rabbit said that he, too, had been blind since birth. The two animals then forgot about the collision and began commiserating concerning the problems of being blind.

The snake said that his greatest regret was the loss of his identity. He had never been able to see his reflection in the water, and for that reason did not know exactly what he looked like, or even what he was. The rabbit declared that he had the same problem. Seeing a way that they could help each other, the rabbit proposed that one feel the other from head to toe, and then try to describe what the other animal was.

The snake agreed, and started by winding himself around the rabbit. After a few moments, he announced, “You’ve got very soft, fuzzy fur, long ears, big rear feet, and a little fuzzy ball for a tail. I think that you must be a bunny rabbit!”

The rabbit was much relieved to find his identity, and proceeded to return the favor to the snake. After feeling about the snake’s body for a few minutes, he asserted, “Well, you’re scaly, you’re slimy, you’ve got beady little eyes, you squirm and slither all the time, and you’ve got a forked tongue. I think you’re a Politician!”