Youth Soccer Coach Forced To Resign for an Un-Politically Correct Letter to His Team

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Mar 312009
 

I’d hire him. I applaud his approach, his views and his humor. Don’t people have any sense of humor anymore?


A youth soccer coach is off the job after sending home a shocking letter to his team of 6 and 7-year-old girls.

The letter didn’t go over so well with parents and the Scituate soccer board and the coach has since resigned.

This is Michael Kinahan’s letter:

Congratulations on being selected for Team 7 (forest green shirts) of the Scituate Soccer Club! My name is Michael and I have been fortunate enough to be selected to coach what I know will be a wonderful group of young ladies. Chris Mac will also be coaching and I expect the ever popular Terry to return to the sidelines. Our first game will be Saturday April 4 at 10:00AM. There will be a half hour of skills followed by a 1 hour game, so total time will be 1.5 hours. All games will be played on the fields in the front of the High School. Each player will be required to wear shin guards and cleats are recommended but not required. A ball will be provided to each player at the first meeting, and each player should bring the ball to games and practices. There is no set practice time allotted for the U8 teams, but I will convene with the coaches to determine the best time and place. If there are cancellations due to rain, all notices will be posted via the Scituate Soccer Club website, no calls will be made (though I will try to send an email). Attached is the Schedule and Code of Conduct. After listening to the head of the referees drone on for about 30 minutes on the dangers of jewelry (time which I will never get back), no player will be allowed to play with pierced ears, hairclips, etc. We used to tape the earings, but that practice is no longer acceptable. Please let me know if your child has any health issues that I need to be aware of. My home phone is 781 XXX XXXX, my cell number is 781 XXX XXXX, and I check my email frequently. According to my wife, my emails get too wordy, so for those of you read too slowly, are easily offended, or are too busy, you can stop here. For the others……

OK, here’s the real deal: Team 7 will be called Green Death. We will only acknowledge “Team 7” for scheduling and disciplinary purposes. Green Death has had a long and colorful history, and I fully expect every player and parent to be on board with the team. This is not a team, but a family (some say cult), that you belong to forever. We play fair at all times, but we play tough and physical soccer. We have some returning players who know the deal; for the others, I only expect 110% at every game and practice. We do not cater to superstars, but prefer the gritty determination of journeymen who bring their lunch pail to work every week, chase every ball and dig in corners like a Michael Vick pit bull. Unless there is an issue concerning the health of my players or inside info on the opposition, you probably don’t need to talk to me. Coach MacDonald has been designated “good guy” this year.

Some say soccer at this age is about fun and I completely agree. However, I believe winning is fun and losing is for losers. Ergo, we will strive for the “W” in each game. While we may not win every game (excuse me, I just got a little nauseated) I expect us to fight for every loose ball and play every shift as if it were the finals of the World Cup. While I spent a good Saturday morning listening to the legal liability BS, which included a 30 minute dissertation on how we need to baby the kids and especially the refs, I was disgusted. The kids will run, they will fall, get bumps, bruises and even bleed a little. Big deal, it’s good for them (but I do hope the other team is the one bleeding). If the refs can’t handle a little criticism, then they should turn in their whistle. The sooner they figure out how to make a decision and live with the consequences the better. My heckling of the refs is actually helping them develop as people. The political correctness police are not welcome on my sidelines. America’s youth is becoming fat, lazy and non-competitive because competition is viewed as “bad”. I argue that competition is good and is important to the evolution of our species and our survival in what has become an increasingly competitive global economy and dangerous world. Second place trophies are nothing to be proud of as they serve only as a reminder that you missed your goal; their only useful purpose is as an inspiration to do that next set of reps. Do you go to a job interview and not care about winning? Don’t animals eat what they kill (and yes, someone actually kills the meat we eat too – it isn’t grown in plastic wrap)? And speaking of meat, I expect that the ladies be put on a diet of fish, undercooked red meat and lots of veggies. No junk food. Protein shakes are encouraged, and while blood doping and HGH use is frowned upon, there is no testing policy. And at the risk of stating the obvious, blue slushies are for winners.

These are my views and not necessarily the views of the league (but they should be). I recognize that my school of thought may be an ideological shift from conventional norms. But it is imperative that we all fight the good fight, get involved now and resist the urge to become sweat-xedo-wearing yuppies who sit on the sidelines in their LL Bean chairs sipping mocha-latte-half-caf-chinos while discussing reality TV and home decorating with other feeble-minded folks. I want to hear cheering, I want to hear encouragement, I want to get the team pumped up at each and every game and know they are playing for something.

Lastly, we are all cognizant of the soft bigotry that expects women and especially little girls, to be dainty and submissive; I wholeheartedly reject such drivel. My overarching goal is develop ladies who are confident and fearless, who will stand up for their beliefs and challenge the status quo. Girls who will kick ass and take names on the field, off the field and throughout their lives. I want these girls to be winners in the game of life. Who’s with me?

Go Green Death!

Source…


Glenn Beck Rips CT Attorney General Richard Blumenthal a New One

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Mar 312009
 

Glenn Beck hands Richard Blumenthal’s ass back to him on a plate!


Wow! Was this ever the barn-burner!?!? Today on his show, Glenn Beck had on Washington Times reporter, Jennifer Haberkorn, on the show to talk about the latest scandal involving Chris Dodd & AIG. After that short piece, Richard Blumenthal, CT’s Attorney General, stepped into the Beck ring unwisely so. Beck SAVAGED the A.G. for selective law enforcement, and Blumenthal was a blubbering idiot. Beck admits he’s not a scholar, only a common man with common sense knowledge, but this doofus Blumenthal was appeared like a tin can taken to a Ginsu knife!

OUCH! That HAD to hurt. Talk about Q&A jujitsu!

Source…


Joke Of The Day

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Mar 312009
 

A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, “I can’t stop passing gas. Luckily, my farts don’t smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I’ve farted twice since I’ve been here in your office, but you didn’t even notice.”

“I can help you,” says the doc. “Take these pills and come back next week.”

The next week, the lady returns. “Doctor,” she says, “I don’t know what you gave me, but now my farts reek.”

The doctor says, “Good, we fixed your sinuses! Now let’s work on your hearing.”

A Sure Cure for Constipation

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Mar 312009
 

If you are bothered by occasional or frequent constipation, look in the mirror and repeat the following phrase three times in succession when symptoms occur:

“My financial and personal well being are totally in the hands of Barack Obama, Joe Biden, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Tim Geithner, Rahm Emmanual, Barney Frank, Chris Dodd, and Al Gore”

If that doesn’t scare the shit out of you, then you are probably destined to be backed up for the rest of your life.

There is no need to thank me for this advice, I’m just doing a public service.

Rush Limbaugh: Obama Guarantees Sacrifice By Redistributing Your Wealth

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Mar 312009
 

Rush nails it!

“It is this world, a world where cruise ships throw away more food in a day than most residents of Port-au-Prince see in a year, where white folks’ greed runs a world in need, apartheid in one hemisphere, apathy in another hemisphere.” ~ Barack Obama – The Audacity of Hope


Rush Limbaugh reported on Barack Obama’s intentions to redistribute your wealth today on his radio show (March 30, 2009). Rush also linked Obama’s socialist plans to his tutilage by Rev. Jeremiah Wright and Bill Ayers. Limbaugh also attacked Obama’s negative wife in this devastating segment.

Hat tip Gateway Pundit

Angie Harmon: I’m Not Racist Because I Disagree With Obama

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Mar 312009
 

Let’s see if I get this right… if you are a Liberal and you disagree with George W. Bush that makes you patriotic but if you are a Conservative and you disagree with President Hussein that makes you a racist.

Nigga Please! Angie is a Patriot!

“I am ready to concede that Obama’s stupidity and ignorance come from his white half if he agrees to resign and be replaced by one of the many millions of intelligent and competent people of color who have actually held a job before” ~ Never on my watch (Free Republic)


Angie Harmon is not afraid to come out and say she doesn’t like how President Obama is handling the job — but she’s sick of having to defend herself from being deemed a racist.

“Here’s my problem with this, I’m just going to come out and say it. If I have anything to say against Obama it’s not because I’m a racist, it’s because I don’t like what he’s doing as President and anybody should be able to feel that way, but what I find now is that if you say anything against him you’re called a racist,” Harmon told Tarts at Thursday’s Los Angeles launch of the new eyelash-growing formula, Latisse. “But it has nothing to do with it, I don’t care what color he is. I’m just not crazy about what he’s doing and I heard all about this, and he’s gonna do that and change and change, so okay … I’m still dressing for a recession over here buddy and we’ve got unemployment at an all-time high and that was his number one thing and that’s the thing I really don’t appreciate. If I’m going to disagree with my President, that doesn’t make me a racist. If I was to disagree with W, that doesn’t make me racist. It has nothing to do with it, it is ridiculous.”

Speaking of dislikes, the starlet has also had enough of the double-standards in the media.

“I do think McCain would have done a better job, only because I think he has more experience. I also think if W or John McCain or Reagan would have gone and done a talk show, the backlash would have been so huge and in his face, and ‘What is our president doing? How unclassy!’ But Obama does it and no one says anything,” Harmon said.

And in spite of the scornful opinions most of her Tinseltown counterparts have shared on Gov. Sarah Palin, Harmon remains a true fan.

“I admire any kind of woman like her. My whole motto is to know what I stand for and know what I don’t stand for and have the courage to live my life accordingly and she does exactly that. The fact that this woman has made the decisions she’s made and literally lived her life according to that and takes heat for it is absolutely disgusting to me,” she added. “People cannot look at this woman. I really think they’re afraid of her and her morals, ethics and values and the fact that she hangs on them. Is she the most experienced person in the world? But she was running to be the Vice President, so we then put the most inexperienced person as the President. That didn’t make any sense to me.”

Read more…


Barack Obama (D-Kenya) Forces the CEO of GM to Resign

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Mar 302009
 

Government control of private businesses is the essence of fascism… Mussolini-Style Corporatism!


The Obama administration asked Rick Wagoner, the chairman and CEO of General Motors, to step down and he agreed, a White House official said.

On Monday, President Barack Obama is to unveil his plans for the auto industry, including a response to a request for additional funds by GM and Chrysler. The plan is based on recommendations from the Presidential Task Force on the Auto Industry, headed by the Treasury Department.

The White House confirmed Wagoner was leaving at the government’s behest after The Associated Press reported his immediate departure, without giving a reason.

General Motors issued a vague statement Sunday night that did not officially confirm Wagoner’s departure.

“We are anticipating an announcement soon from the Administration regarding the restructuring of the U.S. auto industry. We continue to work closely with members of the Task Force and it would not be appropriate for us to speculate on the content of any announcement,” the company said.

Read more…


Sudden Adult Death Syndrome: Man Dies While Using Wii Fit

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Mar 302009
 


So, how long before the Wii is labeled a death machine and people will be encouraged to boycott it?


A MAN of 25 collapsed and died moments after playing Nintendo Wii Fit games.

Labourer Tim Eves had been jogging on the spot as he used the machine in his home.

Then he keeled over in front of his girlfriend Emma Tuck and best pal Lewis Hickin.

Emma, 26, and Lewis, 25, tried desperately to revive him but he was declared dead on arrival at hospital despite the efforts of paramedics.

Tim, a scout leader who enjoyed cycling, fishing and playing drums in a rock band, had been fit and well.

The tragedy happened the day he got home to Hopton-on-Sea, Norfolk, after visiting parents Alan and June in Portugal to celebrate his mum’s 50th birthday.

It is believed he might have been a victim of Sudden Adult Death Syndrome.

June said: “We spoke to him on the phone when he was playing the Wii. He told us he had just ordered himself a kebab and was sitting there with a glass of port. A little while after he collapsed.”

Shocked Emma said: “I love Tim loads and will miss him so much.”

Source…


Other Questions

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Mar 302009
 

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.

2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way.

3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
They Take The Psycho Path.

4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The He11 Out Of It.

5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!

6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
Polaroids.

7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn’t work?
A Stick.

8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn’t Yours?
Nacho Cheese.

9. What Do You Call Santa’s Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.

10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko.

11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.

12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
Frostbite.

13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean and Twitches?
A Nervous Wreck.

14. What’s The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef.

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him.

16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.

17. Why Don’t Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog.

18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka.

19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
The Location Of The Dirt Bag.

20. What’s The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang! and a Bad Skydiver Goes Dang, Whack!

21. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
Somebody’s Gonna Lose A Trailer!

 Posted by at 4:46 am  Tagged with:

The Irish Bagpiper

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Mar 302009
 


As a bagpiper, I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man who had no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery in the remote countryside and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and being a typical man, did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew who were eating lunch but the hearse was nowhere in sight.

I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side of the open grave where I saw the vault lid already in place.

I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long but this was the proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I played out my heart and soul.

As I played the workers began to weep. I played and I played like I’d never played before, from Going Home and The Lord is My Shepherd to Flowers of the Forest. I closed the lengthy session with Amazing Grace and walked to my car.

As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, “Sweet Jeezuz, Mary’n Joseph, I never seen nothin’ like that before and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.”