Jeff Gordon Takes Advantage of a Government Bailout

Jeff Gordon made the decision to fire his entire NASCAR pit crew and take advantage of a Government bailout plan that would employ Chicago Ghetto Kids. This was brought about by a documentary on how the Chicago Ghetto Kids were able to remove 4 tires in less than 6 seconds without Hi-Tech Equiptment – whereas Gordon’s existing crew could only perform this task in 8 seconds with millions of dollars woth of equipment

This was thought to be an excellent and very bold move by Jeff Gordon as most races are won or lost in the pit stop. However. Gordon got more than he bargained for.

At the crew’s 1st practice session, not only was the inexperienced crew able to change all 4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had re-painted the car installed 4 rolls of duct tape in problem areas & sold the car to Dale Earnhard Jr. for 10 cases of Bud, a bag of weed and several nude photo’s of Jeff Gordon’s wife in the shower