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Oct 312014
 

We all remember the Halloween classic “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown!“. But after watching this bizarre video you will be saying… My God… What did I just watch?!

Genießen!

This lost classic short film of 1990 is a post reunification Nihilist allegory of the tensions between the immigrant worker population of Germany and the natives who still long for Heimat. When foreign bullies cajole a young German man into trying to kick an American football. Hilarity ensues.

Good Grief! Cancer Boy! is a strange little film made by Todd Graham in 1990 that reveals the utter futility of Charlie Brown’s very existence- in German!

Todd shows us what Charlie Brown might have become if Charles Schulz had allowed him to grow up… I guess it’s a good thing he never aged!

Source…

 

Good Grief Charlie Brown

 

Oct 312014
 

Once again… the learning never stops.

Enjoy!

How to Laugh in a Diabolical Way

Ever wish you could laugh like the bad guys in movies? Well, now you can! Watch this video, and Joe Brown will teach you how to laugh like the diabolical bad guys do in the holly wood movies. Oh, and if you are looking for Judge Joe Brown then you are at the wrong place. This Joe Brown is a completely different type of Judge. He’s a judge that judges no one because judging people is wrong.

 

How To Laugh In A Diabolical Way

 

Oct 312014
 
Rubber Chicken A mama pumpkin and a baby pumpkin were on the way to the beach. While they were crossing the street, the baby pumpkin was run over by a speeding car. Mama pumpkin caught a cab and rushed baby pumpkin to the nearest hospital. Baby pumpkin was taken to the operation room and the doctors worked on him for several hours. After what seemed like eternity, Mama pumpkin saw a doctor come out of the operation room.

The doctor said, “The good news is that your baby has survived the operation and will live. But he is going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life”.

 

 

Oct 302014
 

The Wolves WithinAn old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice… “Let me tell you a story.”

“I too, at times, have felt great hate for those who have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It’s like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times.”

“It is as if there are two wolves inside me; one is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.”

“But…the other wolf… ah! The littlest thing will send him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all of the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing.”

“Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”

The boy looked intently into his Grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which one wins, Grandfather?”

The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, “The one I feed.”

 

Oct 302014
 

Did you know: you can fit all of the planets in our Solar System in between the Earth and the Moon?

All The Planets Fit Between The Earth And The Moon

To illustrate the distance between the Earth and the Moon, reddit user PerplexingPotato posted an image that placed the other seven planets in our solar system between them.

Planet Average Diameter (km)
Mercury 4,879
Venus 12,104
Mars 6,771
Jupiter 139,822
Saturn 116,464
Uranus 50,724
Neptune 49,244
Total 380,008

 

The average distance from the Earth to the Moon is 384,400 km. And check it out, that leaves us with 4,392 km to spare.

So what could we do with the rest of that distance? Well, we could obviously fit Pluto into that slot. It’s around 2,300 km across. Which leaves us about 2,092 km to play with. We could fit one more dwarf planet in there (not Eris though, too big).

The amazing Wolfram-Alpha can make this calculation for you automatically: total diameter of the planets. Although, this includes the diameter of Earth too.

Source…

 
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Oct 302014
 

Michelangelo’s David Fat

The usually sculpted David has been recreated to show what would have happened to his ordinarily chiseled abs had he lived his life the way the majority of our society does today.

The “If you don’t move, you get fat” campaign is found in Hamburg and is creative genius of ad agency, Scholz & Friends, for the German Olympic Sport Federation.

This is simply fantastic! No word on where it is located exactly or for how long the pieces will be on display. That’s the beauty of the internet though; a clever marketing campaign like this would have been lost a few decades ago, but with the help of the web, a viral display like this can instantly make the global rounds.

Had David been an immobile, donut-eating, Frappucino-slurping Renaissance man, he never would never have become the muse of Michelangelo in the early 1500s.

Source…

Oct 302014
 
Rubber Chicken An Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and Texan were flying across country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says ” We’re having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump, at least one of you can survive”

The four open the door and look out below.

The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers “God Save The Queen” and jumps.

The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers “Viva La France” and he also jumps.

This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers “Remember the Alamo” and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.

 

 

Oct 292014
 

Obituary

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

– Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
– Why the early bird gets the worm;
– Life isn’t always fair; and
– Maybe it was my fault..

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers:
I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I’m A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone…

If you still remember him, pass this on.
If not, join the majority and do nothing.

 

The Death Of Common Sense