May 252018
 
Spelling CheckerEye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight for it to say
Weather I am wrong or write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose before two long
And eye can put the error rite
It’s rarely ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it
Am shore your pleased to no
It’s letter perfect all the weigh
My chequer toiled me sew!

 

 

 

 

May 252018
 
Joke Of The Day: The Skin Graft A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.

However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman’s new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!

One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, ‘Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you.’

‘My darling,’ he replied, ‘I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek.

 

 

 

 

May 242018
 
5 Government Facts

1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.

2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.

3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.

4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.

5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work, because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work, because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation!

 

 

 

 

May 242018
 
Joke Of The Day: Fighting The Competition The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES. The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop.

It read… Main entrance.